“I’ve never once regretted calling a time-out at home or work. Not once. I’ve never experienced a little time and space being a bad thing, but I have plenty regrets the other way around.”
I usually think about the titles of my Blog posts after I have written the piece but this time I knew exactly what the title would be when I read this quote by Brené Brown. Because, it immediately reminded me of something I heard the other day that hit me in the best way possible.
Before I continue with my story I have to confess that I will be the first victim of the social police that goes around the internet making sure people tag and credit the right person (and I know they are coming from the best place possible, I’m just fearful because I know I’m their pray) because I almost never remember who I’m paraphrasing. So, with that said, I have no clue where I listened to this but I’m not going to let that stop me from sharing the “aha moment” because it could be helpful for you as well. However I do apologize to whoever I’m paraphrasing here and not giving credit to, I’m so sorry.
So the other day I was listening to (or maybe reading? or watching? who knows) a show and they were talking about the act of grounding kids. Whether we agree or not with this practice, they mentioned how the meaning behind this could remind us of an important tool that we have at our disposal.
As an adult and as someone that cultivates practices for my own well being I’m very familiar with the act of grounding myself. And when I think about grounding myself I think about the act of coming to right here and now/being in the present moment. So, in this show, they mentioned how the purpose of grounding kids is to allow them to have a moment and space for them to reflect on how their emotions are moving them to behave in a certain way. And, the intention of that time-out is to provide a space for them to feel and process the emotion without the need to re-act.
I loved listening to this because it made me think about the many times I wish I had been grounded as an adult. The many times I was so overwhelmed with my emotions and thoughts that I didn’t have the capability to act in a way that would support my highest well being or the relationship with those around me. And the thing is… as adults we don’t give ourselves these moments for grounding and instead we think we need to push harder, and try harder, and “don’t stop until your proud”.
But, what if by stopping we actually get to be proud? Because in that moment and space, we allow ourselves to feel and process our emotions and we allow our brain to have a minute to re-set instead of protecting itself from the overwhelm and activating the fight or flight response.
I will never think about grounding in the same way and from now on I will always encourage a time-out for myself.
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